Arjun

Dearest Arjun

A year back when you were born it was a shower of happiness on all of us..

I know you haven't seen us..and many of us haven't seen you in person as well, but you are loved dearly by us all.

We know how much we long to see you and meet you .

Of all, you were dearly loved by your "Sekhar That ha". I still remember how excited he was on your arrival. He was overwhelmed to see how beautiful you are.. From the moment you were born he was very eager to meet you..I know wherever he is he would love u and bless you with all his heart and soul. 

You called him "Thatha" and his heart was overpowered with love. It was a sight..a small cheer in the midst of pain..

You bring joy and love once again to all of us . Though far away a piece of our hearts remains with you. 

  

LOVE YOUR ATTA

First anniversary

It's our happy first anniversary!🙂 It feels like I'm in a dream world..it's been a year already..I can still feel the euphoria when u were tying the holy thread..I felt all the universes have come together to unite us..it is a blessing! After a year I would say it was the most treasured moment and the best blessing I had. This one year passed by like a flow of wind..so cool and refreshing.. days just went like a ride..I enjoy living with you and I cherish every moment. I know there's a long way for us to go we would grow old together and have tons of moments and fun. U have been my shoulder in grief and my happiness. Cheers to all the years of our journey till date.. and to all the years to come.. Love you always ♥️

Lost

where were you lost in the dark hours of the night..

where were you lost in the broken dreams of your heart..

lovely eyes filled with joy turned darker in dismay..

pretty heart with love for all filled anger in debuity..

distant love is the only sight u see in the dark

and light of dearest love so close seems disdain..

where have you lost in midst of the muddle..

where have you lost in the deepest agony..

tears filled eyes can't see the vision u dreamt..

bewildered mind can't guide u to make the right choices..

calm down for a while..look within ur self..

ask ur lost soul who it always wanted to be..

and who you have become..

be guided by the truth even if it is hard to accept..

bring back the lost senses..and live the life with prepense..

Dad

Dear Dad..

When you were by my side...

Everytime when life was putting me through tough times, I always said to myself that life can only get better..Now when you left us all..I could only say I should get better coz I know the void you left can never be filled and the life I lived with you by my side is the best. 

cockroach

There lived a happy family of cockroach, wandering everywhere for food or walk or merriness in my home. Big one which popped out of a whole was killed immediately by me thinking it might harm me some way or sometime just out of fear.. next day a little one came by may be in search of her elder but was again killed with the same intent. Niether the elder or the little had to harm me they were simply living their life and passing by. Elder could be a parent, the little could be new born. I killed them just out of fear though they are innocent, though they never caused harm or might not even harm. After this act while I was mourning for the demise of my dad..what difference is left between a human and a insect in  death. Either could be killed anytime for any reason. The law of death is same.

I feel pressure is good.

I was enjoying my magnum ice cream after having my lunch( biryani) Sunday special u see and was thinking..why am I having it when I don't want to have it? Well I have been trying to diet from a long time since my marriage. Marriage has given me a freedom to eat anything I like. I now have no pressure to think how I look and how much I put on and also for the fact that I'm staying home..thanks to corona..I feel okay to indulge in my favorite food. But the guilt that peeks out when I see myself in my mirror cautions me enough. I shrugg it off and say just one more time whenever I wish to eat something very tasty..all the tasty ones are mostly fattening! So I was thinking I was better when I had some pressure on me atleast with the thought how people think of me when I go for work. Coz I used to workout and diet. Sometimes pressure is good too.. 

My birthday@2020

It's a memorable day.. pruthvi started his preparations for the day on 14th with help of the boys..it was a bit funny how he managed but it turned out really well.. we started preparing to bake the cake. He was the one who is baking when I was helping him by passing the necessary ingredients. And he is continuously interrupted with the calls from the boys.. I know they are planning something but he managed to be silent despite my hundreds of questions.i looked calm but was very excited. And while mixing the cake batter he suddenly asked me to leave everything and took me for a walk. I thought they are going to surprise me outside so I wore my jeans and sandals but there was nothing outside.He made me walk farther than I thought and my ankle started hurting. And we reached home an hour later..boom they decorated it so well. I loved it. I was so happy.boys left and we started making the cake.it was almond flour and we are trying it for the first time. Done we baked the cake it didn't look quite as expected but we are happy the way the outer crust came out.we had our dinner and were waiting for the clock to hit the zero hour. As the last minutes of the 11th hour started slipping by my mom called me. And she too baked a cake..I have cut the cake with my parents my Anna and his family online and pruthvi by my side along with the boys. I was so so happy.i got wishes from soumya, attaya and mavayya as well. And here comes the real surprise..he gifted me with an I Watch. And boys too gave me Versace shades. Wow what a birthday.never imagined anything more beautiful than this. Above all it's the first time that I was with him for all day of my birthday. I am so thankful for all this.i am proud that I am his wife and I love him dearly. Coz he showers love to me all the time.

I am alive

When I smile through the darkness and dance to the wildest tunes I am alive...

When I hold my breath for few more minutes in the hardest moments I am alive..

When my heart could still think of love in the midst of deep hatred I am alive...

When my eyes could dream of light at the dark hours I am alive..

When hope embraces my lips and laughter shines at the stormy days I am alive...

అమ్మా

 అమ్మా  ప్రేమకు రూపం నువ్వు ..
నా మొదటి గురువు నువ్వు..
ప్రతి భాధలో తలచుకున్న దైవం నువ్వు..
నా ధైర్యం వెనుక శక్తివి నువ్వు
నన్ను మంచి వ్యక్తిగా మలచిన ఆదర్శం  నువ్వు..
ఏంత ఎదిగిన నాలో దాగిన బాల్యం గుర్తు నువ్వు...
ఏన్ని తప్పులు చేసిన ఏన్ని ఓోటములు ఏదురైన
నన్ను విడవని ఓోదారుపు నువ్వు..
నీ ఊపిరినీ ఆయువు గా చేసావు..
నీ రక్త మాంసాలతో రూపం పోసావు..
ప్రాణముగా సాకి జన్మను ఇచ్చావు..
దైవానికి సైతం దక్కని నా వరం నువ్వు..
నా కోరిక చెప్పన..
నువ్వు ఏప్పుడు నవ్వు తుండాలి.. మన ఇంటికి వెలుగు నీ చిరునవ్వు
నీలో ఆనందం చూడాలి మా అందరి నిజమైన విజయం నీ సంతోషం...
నువ్వు ఆరోగ్యం గా ఉండాలి మా బలం నువ్వు..
నవ్వుతూ నవ్విస్తూ ఉండాలి
 I love you amma

If it’s the end

Now that the world is in chaos and every day seems a boon..
Knowing Life could end any day is the reality of today
I don’t wish anymore.. I don’t want to say I wish I could..
Let me eat my favorite food.. I let myself to be as free I could..
Let me draw something new though it seems inane..
I cook for I would feel I’m a master chef👩🏻‍🍳 don’t mind if it’s burnt..🤪
I giggle and fight and do all the goofy things with him coz every minute is a moment😁
I write or scribble all that is born in my mind even its gibberish
I binge watch all my favorite movies and seasons..
I read the books I love and reminiscence my dairies..
For who knows what tomorrow has in its sack..
If this day is a normal day with no twists and turns of the outer chaos..
I let myself live it to the most..

Balcony

To my dear balcony..
I haven’t known how much u could solace me until the recent times.
Thank you for saving me by keeping close to the nature..
You are that space of my home which has become vital and favorable
You help me in experiencing the cool breeze
The sun kisses my skin through u while I stand there watching the greens..
I am not forgotten about the birds and trees and minute creatures while glaring around walking through your space .
The nests and the stems the barren trees all look beautiful
With you I have a freedom in my little space to explore the outer world.
I don’t feel alone as I watch my fellow beings outside..
Today I want to say I am thankful for having you while I caged myself in my nest for the fear of pandemic..

two questions

Every morning I ask myself what excites me..and today it's art and exercise..every night I ask myself was I content with my day and it was yes for yesterday..

habbit

I started sketching and mandala drawing regularly.. and they are coming really well..this habbit has now turned into a madness. I feel the eagerness to draw something and also learn new methods and all different styles.. this habbit has got into me such a way that I wanna Excel in it. But this feeling is so nice..I am trying something new everyday.exploring my skills..I'm loving this

women's day!

To the world.. thanks for choosing a day to celebrate women..But women isn't to be celebrated just for a day but always....

Ever thought of the women who had been bullied and outrageously raped?? She still fights for her respect not just a day but everyday..

Women who have been attacked physically verbally and through terrifying chemicals manage to live with jewels of smile and pride..but they struggle for justice everyday..

Thanks for the men who support her to live and who have been their ray of hope..be it her father brother husband or the child who has been abandoned by her world.. with all the scars and bruises she embraces herself with courage and lives on..

World to celebrate women...

Give her love for she makes ur home a heaven

Give her respect for she makes ur future to blossom..

Give her education she makes the world shine..

Keep her secured and treat her equal for she delivers the child  of today tomorrow and forever.

Celebrate her not by age or color or education or caste but because she is her who teaches the world the love and compassion, strength and courage..

My Love

I love you and will always love u...

I loved u even when I felt the fear of losing u..

I loved u even when I had no hope of coming to u..

I loved u even when my world is against u..

I love you when we passed all hurdles and are together..

I love you when I cuddle u and laugh with you..

I'll love u even when I feel low and agahst..

I'll love u for no hope and return..

I'll love u for no mission and reason..

For I love u for whoever and whatever you are..

For I love u not for the world or a moment but for life..

The Child In Me

The Day when i fell in love with you

I knew the child in me was still alive..

coz i could love someone so dearly as i love myself

without intending anything in return..

The Day when i got married to you

after so many year of wait

I still realize the child in me is alive

coz i chuckle and giggle

i play and act i do all that it takes

to be around you and shower love to you..

Age seems just a number

and my beauty doubles with smiles when you are by my side..

The desire to learn something new

to endure and accomplish something

to let u know that i want to be your partner in life and living

reminds me that the child in me is still alive..

New year welcome in US

I and pruthvi together welcomed our new year after our marriage at Universal studios, Orlando. It was a totally new experience for me. Not just being in a different country and different place but also going to someplace to welcome a year. I haven't done it in my life until now. I liked the thought and was very excited about it. As I entered there I have decided to enjoy every moment. It was an awesome place. I have seen several different people all around me trying their own style and finding ways to enjoy the night. I have learnt a new culture. I danced to the music though I haven't done it earlier I really enjoyed doing it. I didn't judge people or things around me I saw them as they are and tried to understand what it is. Just before the clock hit 0 hours we were dancing at the stage and we started counting the seconds to welcome the year. Lights everywhere and I wished him new year kissing and hugging him. He wished me the same way. Oh this is something I never even dreamt of. It was great to be together I loved that we are married and living that moment holding each others hands. I thank God for giving this moments.